This is not the end.

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Whirlwind Wedding Weekend

John and I are now back in Korea after our whirlwind trip home to California for my brother's wedding. It was SO beautiful! We had such a wonderful time seeing family and friends, and celebrating my brother and his new wife. 

Here are some photos of the beautiful day: 

Getting ready with the seester & my big girl shoes. 

From top left, clockwise: brother, dad, mom, husband

Here comes the beeeeautiful bride! 

The handoff. 

CUTE decorations! 

Dancing in to the reception. 

Table 12--I helped make the wedding favors! 

Speeches & songs. 

Dancing & cake. 

The getaway car. 

Congratulations SO much, Mr. & Mrs. Majzoub! 

I love you both dearly! 

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Today I'm Thankful for Korean Health Insurance.

Today the hubs and I ran some errands around town. 

One of the places we stopped was at the doctor's office. 

John needed to see his doctor and refill a prescription.

I waited for him in the waiting room and played Angry Birds as he talked with his doctor. 

After he was finished he walked into the lobby to pay his bill. 

I was ready with pricked up ears and our open EEBA app, 

ready to input the total amount into our budget. 

$3.25. 

That's how much his doctor's visit cost. 

We walked downstairs to the pharmacy to pick up his prescription 

and dropped a whopping $4.25 on multiple medicines. 

As we walked out the pharmacy doors and I input the amount into our budget app

I exclaimed, "$7.50 for a doctor's visit and meds! Why are we leaving this country again??" 

Our life is much cheaper here, much more secure. 

When we go back to California in the fall, there won't be much security waiting for us.

We will be DEBT-FREE, praise the Lord!!!, but that'll be it.  

No jobs lined up, no immediate health insurance, no real savings. 

It is easy for me to be tempted to stay here--where it's cheap, 

secure, safe, and comfortable. 

It's easy for me to worry about our tomorrow.

And then that old Sunday School verse will creep back into my head, 

slowly it will creep from where I've hidden it my heart all those years ago. 

So, today I will try not to worry about my tomorrows. 

And today I am thankful for Korean health insurance. 

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Perfect Peace

I've been pretty quiet around here lately. 
Remember how I committed to choosing love this year? Remember that big post I wrote on change? 
Change + choosing love = difficult. Therefore, I've been quiet around here lately. 
The hubs and I are getting closer and closer to making some firm decisions about all of our options that I mentioned in my "Change" post. As I said in that post, the decisions that we have ahead of us are not easy, and it turns out I was right. 
In the last few weeks I have jumped from one emotional breakdown to another; and in between, my days seem to consist of busyness and stress, with sprinkles of marital arguments to top off this depressing sundae.  
In the few moments of truth and clarity that I have enjoyed in these last weeksI've been able to recognize that all of these compounding sins and stresses all stem from one source: fear. 
What the heck are we doing with our lives? Is my husband strong enough to lead us? What if we don't have enough money saved up? What if we leave? What if we don't leave? What will happen to my lovable cat? What about our family and friends, what will they think? ARE WE DOING THE RIGHT THING? 
I'm afraid. I'm afraid of leaving. I'm afraid of staying. I'm afraid of losing my cat. I'm afraid of losing touch with my friends. I'm afraid of falling right back into our old materialistic lifestyle. I'm afraid of moving across the world. Again. I'm afraid that we won't be able to afford having children. I'm afraid that we won't be able to have children. I'm afraid of taking risks. I'm afraid because I don't know what's coming. I'm afraid of not being in control. I'm afraid of change. 
It's in these overwhelming seasons of life that I must choose to  cling to the promises of God. I don't feel like He's working all things out for my good. I don't feel loved and justified. I don't feel His perfect peace. 
But it's there. 

He will keep me in PERFECT PEACE, and oh boy could I really use some. But, I have to do my part too. His peace comes in partnership with my trust. Not that I could ever do anything to gain anything from God, He gives freely and I am so undeserving of his blessings! But, nevertheless, He asks me to trust Him. How can I choose to trust Him, every moment, every day, even when I don't feel like it? Even when I don't feel Him near? Even when the benefits of His peace don't come right away? 
O Lord, help me trust You! Give me Your perfect peace. And may I be like Jesus. 

PS: I created that Isaiah 26:3 photo above as a reminder of God's promise of perfect peace; if you like the photo you can click on it and it will redirect  you to a bigger versionthat you can save to your computer and print out as a reminder for yourself as well. 

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InstaFriday {7}

Panda hoodie / inspiration board make-over / hott drummer hubs / brekkie / cold temperatures / crunchy snow / honey BBQ meatloaf, pan-fryed broccoli, & sweet potato-carrot mash / hubs & pies / berry spritzer w/honey whipped cream /  #bangs / cute Sam / Easy-Peasy Heart Banner /crockpot cookin' / hoarfrost / love bug / necklace

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Choose Love: Health

At the beginning of this year, I committed to choosing love.
Part of this commitment is a choice to love my body. 
This is a hard commitment. And not just because I'm a woman. I believe that every single person struggles with body image and self-confidence in one way or another.
Personally, I've always struggled with balance. I love good food and I'm not a huge fan of hard exercise. But as I've gotten older, I'm realizing that I can't just eat whatever I want and get away with it. My body is keeping its records, and the records aren't looking too good right now. 
So, I have committed to loving my body. 
What does that look like? 
Well, firstly, I believe what the Bible says in Psalm 139, that I am created by God. 

  And because I know that I am so wonderfully made, it makes sense to me that I take care of this body that God has given me. 
So, down to the practical stuffs: I have been exercising, and plan on staying committed to exercising, with the 30 Day Shred by Jillian Michaels.  So far, I am loving this workout. Jillian is tough and concise, giving me a fantastic, full body workout in 30 minutes a day. I asked the hubs to join me for a workoutand here's what he said about it. I've also been working on choosing GOOD foods to put in my body. And as gooooood as cheesecake tastes,  it's not the good kind of food that I'm thinking about. 
I'm trying to view my food as fuel these days. Put the good stuff in, and I'll be able to perform at my best. But, like I said earlier, I love good food, so I'm looking for healthy AND delicious options here! 
Here are some recipes that I've found on Pinterest that I have already tried or am really looking forward to trying: 

Source: multiplydelicious.com via Ferial on Pinterest

Source: chocolatecoveredkatie.com via Ferial on Pinterest

Source: skinnytaste.com via Ferial on Pinterest

Source: chocolatecoveredkatie.com via Ferial on Pinterest

And, yes, those chocolate recipes are HEALTHY.  Go, check 'em out. You're welcome. 

 

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InstaFriday {6}

Geek chic with the hubs / My very first Korean film with no subtitles / a cupcakery / Every Monday morning I get together with a dear friendand her adorable son for our weekly non-coffee date, it's a highlight of my week! /Ho Lee Chow American-Chinese food in Seoul / date night with the hubs / Teacher views / Monday blues / Teacher Ferial, Student Sam / I sewed my first bag using this tutorial and this tutorial / Mesmerized by the iTunes visualiser / 설날 잘보내세요! (Happy Lunar New Year!) 

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Work

I dread Mondays. 

It's a sad reality of my life right now. 

My work situation is very difficult

and frustrating at the moment. 

As most of you know, 

I am an ESL teacher at a Korean community center. 

And as the resident specialist in young children, 

my days generally consist of the ABC's, 

storytelling time, and lots of hand sanitizer. 

Doesn't sound that bad, right? 

And to be perfectly honest, it's not. 

It's not that bad. 

But, 

it's been not that bad 

for a long time now. 

It would be very hard for me to explain

how exactly my job sucks, 

and I really don't want this post to turn into complaining, 

even though I'm really good at complaining about my job. 

I just wanted to be able to document this part of my life, 

for remembrance's sake and also in light of 

the commitment I made at the beginning of this year 

to choose love. 

While reading through my Google Reader this morning

I came across a quote that my dear friend posted on her blog. 

The quote is from a man named Steven Furtick 

and it was exactly what I needed to hear today: 

“The situation around you may look nothing 

like the vision God has put inside you.

But by the power of faith,

you can turn your small beginning into a grand finale.

Here’s the way Jesus put it in Matthew 17:20:

‘I tell you the truth,

if you have faith as small as a mustard seed,

you can say to this mountain,

“Move from here to there”

and it will move.

Nothing will be impossible for you.’”

In this frustrating, cross-cultural, unfulfilling, mundane, ever-shifting, and unstable jobI want to choose faith. I want to choose love. 
 O LORD, help. 

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New Year's Resolution

That's what I want to do this year. 

And every year, for that matter, 

but let's take it one step at a time. 

This year I want to choose love. 

In EVERY situation. 

LOVE God. 

LOVE my husband. 

LOVE my family and friends. 

LOVE my students. 

LOVE my co-workers. 

LOVE my body and my health. 

What will "choosing love" look like? 

I'm not entirely sure. 

I'm excited and scared of the prospects.

What does it look like to choose love
when I'm on the brink of an argument with my husband?
What does it mean to choose love
in a classroom of rambunctious ESL students?
What does choosing love look like
with my Bible-reading, my prayer time,
my eating habits, my money-spending, and my time schedule?

I intend to find out.
And I hope to be able to document
my experiences here at Ferial-Shmerial.

I'm also asking for your help.
Would you keep me accountable?
Ask me how my choices to love are going.
And won't you join me?
Let's make the choice to love.

"Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, 
clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience...
 And over all these virtues put on love, 
which binds them all together in perfect unity."

-  Colossians 3:12,14

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InstaFriday {5}

The hubs surprise-decorated our home! / Sam decorated himself / First snow in Pyeongtaek! / A warm & yummy coffee date with friends / Last leaves / A tiring Costco trip / Lunch & Pinterest / Popsicle stick reindeer / Slappa da (acoustic) bass / The Nutcracker! / Italian dinner & Charlie Brown Christmas / Vanilla-Cranberry Cake, homemade in the rice cooker! / Q-tip snowflakes / White Christmas for the first time / Homemade Lunchables / Happy New Year, Friends! 

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Insta-Friday {4}

Caramel lattes / Auntie Fay's sleepy bear / fabric heaven / 

playing dominoes with students / Moto takes a trip to the vet / 

parade in Seoul / the hubs' birthday breakfast / 

Reese's cake for the hubs' birthday / autumn arrives at the Magic Tree / 

a street-side snack / big no-heat curls / NEW boots! / 
personalized menu planning sheets / Korean traditional masks / 
his & hers drinks / the only white guy for miles / 
Moto, the cute / 'Give Thanks' signs with popcorn kernels / 
old & new / and it was all yellow... 

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Insta-Friday {3}

Sometimes, cute things happen to me / Bacon-banana pancakes / 
Halloween origami / Halloween Trammell #1 / 
want to take that chair home and craft all over it / 
Auntie Fay's little stud muffin / new menu planning station / 
laminating our fall nature walk / settling / new little aroma lamp / 
Moto begging for cat massage / breaking out the arm warmers / 
Halloween Trammell #2 / little people playing "chess" / 
the measuring and cutting always take up the most time / 
washing the Halloween off of the hubs. 

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New looks + my first {guest post}!

Today I spent waaaay too much time 

tweaking my blog looks. ^^ 

I have to say, I'm pretty pleased with the end results. 

Anywhoo, on to more better things: 

Today is also my very first guest post! 

And who better to be my first guest author

than the man who I love and admire most? 

Without further ado, may I introduce to you the dear hubs, John. 

Check out his wonderful post, The King of the Wood, after the jump! 

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Insta-Friday {2}

Scarf week / The hubs' comeback cup of coffee! / field trip to Cheonan Independence Hall / first hockey game of the season! / public transportation / jar-o-lanterns / wearing socks again / Settlers! / coffee filter bats / standing in history / pretty / meat pies for Canadian Thanksgiving / ball pit with the Kinders / foam spiders / so. much. chicken. / fakies
Happy Insta-Friday! 

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Dear Shampoo...

I miss you.

It's been 3 weeks since we broke up. 

At first, it was great. 

I was so excited and enthusiastic about

joining the 'No Poo' movement and leaving you behind. 

The first two weeks were new and exciting, 

and Baking Soda and Vinegar were taking good care of me. 

Don't you get too excited. 

I'm not ready to run back to you quite yet. 


And I know, they told me the transition period would be tough. 
I've been dependent on you for my whole life, 
so, naturally, ditching you was not going to be easy. 


But I miss your bubbles. 
I miss your smells and soft silkinesses. 
But my research has shown that you're full of harmful chemicals
and my head's dependency on you is causing
an excess of oily drama. 


I don't plan on ever going back to you, 
and I'm hoping that my new relationship with 
Baking Soda and Vinegar 
will last forever. 


Hair's hoping, 

read more "Dear Shampoo..."